I’m Breaking All Habits…

Where do you think that clip went next…? It is small line in the sand to cross from a human into whatever it takes to survive… It is a surreal experience the first time you put that clip in your 9 or 16 and slide the action forward… This isn’t a gun range… You are cocked and locked before you leave the FOB… If the safety is ever disengaged that means you plan to kill a person… It has been a while since the first time we went out into a city with real people with a round in the chamber and only a hair squeeze between what you were and what you are… Every time is the first time… I must admit you are first thrilled by the sound it makes… it sounds like war when everyone in the HUMVEE goes red… all the actions sliding forward… the .50 cal on top makes it’s own distinct sound of comfort… disassociation is the key… you are here… they are on the other side of the transparent armor… sure you are ready… are you…? The first time we ever had to dismount in the field I can tell you… you are not ready… You crouch tense… thumb on the safety… all it takes is the purpose… of course chances are they will shoot first… but you don’t think that way… how did we get here M-Lo…? And why did I let you go out there…?

It is easy to get caught up in the life here… I think so… I am constantly thinking about you… but my mind is here… True… We are here… away from you… but life does go on back home… You will have a Thanksgiving, Christmas and a Happy New Year… We will have each other… And we are sort of a huge defunct family here… wearing the same clothes… So don’t hold back… do what you do… and tell us about it… Sort of a vicarious living… It is probably wrong the way I feel about things… Thanksgiving is just another meal… Christmas is an extra day of mass… New Year is a changed digit… Have to learn to embrace this defunct family… Family this year comes in all shapes, sizes, and armor… I guess secret santa is not such a bad idea Mysteria…

It is quite interesting to watch people deal with being here in their own ways… M-Lo and O turned their humble quarters into straight MTV Cribs… Some aforementioned people focus on wedding porn… higher ranked work themselves to an early grave… others complain… I talk to you… what would I do if you weren’t there…

One of the HUMVEE operator’s obviously is making the best out of any situation… you can barely see it... the left hand corner of her window has a lil pic of her baby… a sight to see...

Someone told me long ago… There's a calm before the storm, I know…!It's been comin' for sometime… When it's over so they say… It'll rain on a sunny day, I know…! Shining down like water…!

Come back tomorrow!